Podcast: “God-Centered Marriage: Building Love That Lasts” – Part 1

Hi, welcome to Finish the Race. Thank you so much for joining me. My name is Sarah Thompson. I’m out here in Oklahoma on Finished the Race.

Today we’re going to be kicking off a new series, a God centered marriage, building love that last. Thank you for listening in. Please show us with your friends and family, people at church, maybe even your elders if you feel like this would be a blessing for people in your congregation. Finish the RaSE is a outgrowth of Christian Talk, which is a day to day journey through the Bible, one chapter at a time.

So in this series, we are going to be one hundred percent dependent on the Holy Spirit in God’s Word to teach us, to encourage us, to even convict us sometimes. So I’m looking forward to what God’s going to do here. This is episode one, the foundation of a God’s enter marriage. All Right, if you’re new to Finish a Race or Christian Talk, I like to go over a few foundational scriptures here because we are, like I said, we are going to be in God’s Word.

And the only way that you can live a life that glorifies God is if you are born again from above. The Holy Spirit is in us. Thus, when we go to read God’s Word, which we call the Bible, which has been compiled into sixty six books that were penned by forty authors over fifteen hundred years on three continents, inspired by God the Holy Spirit, keeping the kind of the bumpers in the alleyways, you know, to make sure that the doctrine stayed strong and that God God’s Word was being written in a way that would express God’s communication to his creatures called humans. Then we are called to learned in God’s Word to be built up and we will be convicted.

And there’s times when we go through scriptures where you’re like, I don’t really like that. Well, as we go through this four part series, it’s crucial that you understand that God’s Word is the authority. God’s Holy Spirit is in us to help us to walk the straight path and conformity to God’s will, keeping in mind that God is love, God is good, God is sovereign, Jesus is King, So we have a good, loving Lord over our lives. We are the doloi.

We are the slaves. We are those who voluntarily through the moving of the Holy Spirit on us. Though, but we we say our Master is good, like in Israel after seven years when they could go free. If the slave loved his master, he could publicly say, I we choose to stay because our master, our Lord is good.

Our Lord Jesus Christ, is perfect, holy, And as we go through the scriptures on marriage, they are good. The writer, one of the writers of the Bible, was inspired by God the Holy Spirit, wrote Hebrews four twelve. Then the Word of God is living, and it’s active. It’s sharper than any double edged sword.

It pierces even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and moral It judges the thoughts and attentions of the heart. As if you’re going through this as a couple, which I pray you are, understand the God’s Word is living. This is not a archaic book of religion, because there’s only one God. There’s only one Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

There’s only one way to the Father, there’s only one Holy Spirit. There’s only one. If you want to put it this way, Religion Latin connecting people, connecting God and Man. It’s a connecting all the other little urs or fall gods.

They don’t exist, they’re not real. They are the constructs of godly men and women. So do not combine. Don’t try to take something from Mormonism or whatever else, and try to connect it to God’s finished Word, because it is living and active, from Genesis to Revelation.

Everything we need for godly living is in here. Paul, before he was martyred, wrote to Timothy, this young protege, that he had disciples to be the as a pastor would be taking over for the areas that they had ministered together. He said, Paul, this is about the same time he said, Hey, hey, Timothy, I finished the race. I ran the course.

I’ve completed it. I did it. There’s a there’s a crown of glory there. There’s crown laid up for me.

But I’m going not just for me, but for all who believe. We said in Two Timothy three fifteen through seventeen to Timothy. From infancy, you have known the holy scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Jesus Christ. All scripture is God breathed, is useful for instruction, for a conviction, for correction, and for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, fully equipped for every good work.

All right, I want to go with those because as we go through the series on a Christian family marriage, we as someone has been married thirty years, thirty one years, we submit to scripture, and when we do humbly, then God is glorified in our families are blessed. All right. When God was creating everything, everything that we can see, the purpose of marriage was laid out almost immediately. And in Genesis two twenty four, after God had saw that after Adam, it was not you know, Adam was alone.

There were male and female of each creature that God had created. But now Adam was alone, and God saw that wasn’t good. So he put him into a sleep, took out a rib, sowed him back up, created eve out of the dust with it. And now here in Genesis two twenty four we see the God’s planned for the marriage, the becoming one flesh.

So Genesis two twenty three, and the man said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh, shall be called woman, for out a man, she was taken for this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and will be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh, and the man and the wife were both naked, and they were not ashamed. When this unity, When this uniting or coming together as one takes place, this fusion like a like an adhesive, two materials and stealing them together. Jesus, when asked about divorce, said well. They said, well, Moses gave the man the permission to just write a certificate of divorce.

But Jesus answered him, have you not read that from the beginning the Creator made them male and female, and said to them, for this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one. Therefore, what God has brought together, let no man separate. A biblical marriage is based on the cornerstone of Jesus Christ.

So Jesus Christ is the cornerstone, and then life is built off of him. And Acts four eleven, Jesus was rejected by those who would not submit or to him as the Messiah, as God, the Son we do as Christians. So in Acts for eleven or four ten through twelve, Peter said, then let this be known to all of you and all the people of Israel. It is by the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, whom you crucified, but whom God raised from the dead, that this man stands before you.

This Jesus is the stone you builders rejected, which has become the cornerstone. Salvation exists, and no one else where. There is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved. This is Psalm one, eighteen twenty two, being prophesied or shared by Peter to the council Psalm one in eighteen twenty two.

The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone. So Jesus Christ is the cornerstone. Everything in our walk, our relationships is built off of him. In this relationship of husband wife coming together, it is really a metaphor of the Church as the bride of Christ, profoundly symbolic, and it’s a theme found throughout the New Testament.

This conveys this intimate, covenantal relationship between Christ and his Church, emphasizing love, unity, purity, and eschatological hope. So the concept of the bride of Christ, which we are as married couples, comes from Ephesians five. So if we turn over to Ephesians five twenty five through twenty seven is reference to the bride of Christ. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her, to sanctify her, cleansing her by the washing with the water through the word, and to present her as himself to himself as a glorious church without stain or wrinkle or any such blemis but holy and blameless.

Here, the sacrificial love of Christ for the Church is likely to the love of a husband who shall have for his wife this willingness to die to self so that the marriage could live. Now Phesians five, if you look at the beginning, because when we get to the verses dealing with husbands, love your wives. Wives, Submit to your husband’s children, submit to your parents. But right now we’re just dealing with the marriage.

So the purpose is Adam and Eve came together for one flesh, and then out of them would come to Messiah when they would fall. But it is the definition and the it is the model of a marriage. One flesh. Let nothing separate it, leave the father and mother.

And then Ephesians five lays out the roles. We already have Jesus as the cornerstone. Now we’re going to look at the different roles of the husband wife in the marriage. If you’re not married, and this is kind of a pre before you say I do, then understand this.

Like in the Jewish culture, family ties were very strong, so when they would leave once parents, it was significant. It was a shift in loyalty and responsibility. This is why when they come come together are united employ It implies a deep covenental bond, not merely a physical or emotional connection, lifelong commitment. So with this in mind, now I’m getting to the point.

So here we go. So will you understand that that there is a biblical mandate for what a marriage is, not what the culture says the marriage is. There’s a strong emphasis on this leaving and cleaving and being one separate, not influenced by the world, but only building your relationship in the Lord on Jesus Christ to cornerstone even as a couple. Ephesians five is about being imitators of God.

So the premise, as we’re getting down to the verses we’re going to finish on the nasb Ephesians five one says, therefore be imitators of God as beloved children and walk in love just as Christ also loved you and gave himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. Okay talks about no filthy languages, no course joking. Walking Christ is the cornerstone, being a sacrifice, being being living lives that would that would be glorious to God, that would bring him glory. Verse eight for you formally for you were formerly darkness, but now you are light in the Lord.

Walk as children in the light, for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth. Try to learn what is pleasing to the Lord. Do not participate on faithful deeds of darkness, but instead of even expose them. So we keep going.

So we’re talking about love and humility and how Jesus gave himself, and the whole chapter is built on on laying your life down and laying down your former desires and being in love with God to the point that you just want to make much of him. So now we get down to the marriage. Verse twenty of Ephesian of five, Paul says, always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father. Actually we go up to nineteen about believers speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing to make melody with your heart, and we do that to the Lord.

Now verse twenty two, we just got in twenty one. Be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. Okay, so we’re both fearfully. This is a biblical marriage.

This as a marriage, it’s strong, built on Jesus Christ as the cornerstone as the foundation. Wives be subject to your own husbands as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, he himself being the savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives ought to be to their husbands and everything.

Okay, So where we at. Both of you, guys are submitted a crobiblical marriage. Both are submitted individually born again with Jesus Christs Lord, coming together as one flesh. Now, Paul says, okay, wives, follow your husband, don’t kick against, don’t try.

You can’t have two directions going. And in premarital or some before the marriage, there should have been a conversation on where is the husband going, what’s the plan? So in the Plan. Now this if this goes back, and Paul, we’ll talk about this in other places. This goes back to the fall in Genesis.

So when they came together Lucifer Eve, she gives in too emotionally, gets buys into the lie that if you eat of this fruit, you’ll be like God. And because of that, then she then in that because of we as made, as Peter said, as a weaker vessel. When it comes to the compassionate side, the wanting for peace can also be drawn into temptation. Because of that, wives then follow the husband be subjected to as in the vision the plan.

Because the husband is subject to Christ, he is accountable for the family. So this is all unity God, the Father. Jesus came down to do the will of the Father. The Holy Spirit draws us unto Jesus, who is our savior, which gives us access to the Father.

Husbands then are accountable for the family and praying and protecting. And then then in the Holy Spirit we lead verse now twenty five. So as difficult as it might be for wives to submit to their husbands to follow to go along help her suitable Verse twenty five. Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the Church and gave himself up for her.

Husbands, love your wives sacrificially why verse twenty six, So that he might sanctify her, having clinster by the washing of the water, with the word, that he might present to himself the Church and all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing. But as she would be wholly and blameless. So husbands ought to love their wives. Now listen to this as their own bodies.

He who loves his own wife loves himself. No one ever hated his own flesh, but nourished and cherished it, just as Christ also does the Church, because we are members of his body. So in this part one of the series, we’ve looked at the biblical purpose of marriage. It is the coming together one flesh, having children, creating, which we’re going to look at next time.

The bride of Christ, Jesus the groom, the role of the different the husband and wife in the family unit together as one accountability, the husband to Christ, the wife supporting alongside but submitting following. The husband then in that relationship is dying to self, as Christ gave himself for the Church, which then doesn’t hinder the prayer life for the relationship of the wife with her Lord and savior Jesus Christ. And then there’s an accountability in place. There is the church itself that can come alongside the men and the women.

But it’s to be a beautiful thing. I didn’t do it right for the first few decades because I was not raised in a Christian home. You may not have been raised in Christian homes. There comes a point though, that when the Holy Spirit turns on the light that you just go what I’ve been if it’s outside of this foundation, has been wrong.

See God has glorified when his people, when his children live of and according to his will, because He’s causing all things to work together for good, and the culture and the world can see that God is good. Because as the children of God that love God and are dependent on God and and walk and step with the Spirit, then the world can say God is good because of these people. When God see a strong When when the world sees a strong marriage, not perfect, but one that is growing in love and making much of Jesus, then the world, then the world can understand that when God will love the world that he gave his only son, and we’ll see it in an episode two when I’m dealing with communication speaking the truth and love. We’ll understand then that as this living example of Jesus the groom and us as the collective as the bride, we’ll understand this communicating of love and truth in the marriage relationship as God speaks to us, to his word as expounded on by the Holy Spirit of God’s truth, love and justice.

Though see God, God is king, Jesus is Lord sovereign. So the foundation of a God’s center marriage is Jesus Christ. The foundation, the cornerstone. It is the couple submitting to scripture and understanding the purpose of marriage, understanding the roles in the marriage, throwing out any types of taking thoughts captive or any type of influence from a secular culture as it’s growing, not contrasting or comparing our marriages to other people.

And then we’ll finish here. Prayer, scripture together anchors the marriage. I’m a lay bloomer on this one too. You have to be praying and going through the word that anchors the marriage.

In Ephesian six, you can look at the armor of God. We’ll probably cover that next time. Daily you have to put on your armor and understand there’s arrows coming to destroy the marriage, to get us off the foundation, the chief cornerstone. There’s plenty of examples of people who have lived according to God’s principles.

You may be in a church like we are in Tulsa. These couples have been married fifty sixty years that are still active in the church. And what you see is this model played out. You see the husband and maybe the retired now or he’s had he dreamed a lot when he was young, and he had a lot of plans and now they’re retired and the wife is is just peaceful and they and there’s just you can see they just walk and step together.

They are one in mind and one in purpose. But they didn’t lose each other. They didn’t lose their individual personality. But everything was in conformity to God’s will.

So that’s the foundation. This is the foundation of a God center marriage. If you talk to people that friends or family or in small groups and people are like, well, you know, we’re considering divorce. God hates divorce.

Take him to what Jesus said, get him in Genesis two twenty four and Ephesians five. And most likely they don’t understand that God’s when he brings brought them together husband and wife. This idea of divorce the horse is ripping apart, is devastating for the family unit, especially if there’s children. For the culture for people that know the couple, So get them to understand that that is they’re one, they’re cemented.

And then ninety nine percent of the time it’s because they either refuse, have not been taught, or don’t want to submit. To Ephesians five, remember it was written by God the Holy Spirit through the men over forty years, over fifteen hundred years, on three continents, and it is finished. It is good for correction. You can take them to Timothy.

It’s good for correction, for rebuke, for building us up in righteousness. I mean instruction, conviction, correction, and training righteousness. Those are those. There are things that only a loving God would cause the Holy Spirit to teach through the Word, because a tyrannical, non existent, false God would just say do it or die.

But we are being sanctified as believers in the marriage relationship, individually as one, also as the symbolic bride of Christ to it’s groom, Jesus Christ. I know I went over those a few times, but hopefully they really kind of sink in because in our next time together we’re going to go over communication, the biblical principles of communication. We’ll be looking at James one nineteen and Ephesians four fifteen. So when do you think, Thank you guys for listening.

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Thanks again for listening. I’m looking forward to hanging out with you guys in episode two or part two called Communication, Speaking the Love, Speaking the Truth and Love again. If you want to go work ahead, we’re gonna look We’re going to look out how to listen effectively and speak respectfully even during conflict, and other things that are important for Christ Center Marriage and James one nineteen and Ephesians four fifteen. Y’ll bless you guys.

I’ll talk to you later.